I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M BACK

08 October 2016

I still can't believe I actually posted something the other day. And I also can't believe I'm back again, and back again so soon at that. Ah, the slippery slope that is the blogging world. You go two years without writing a damn thing and then when you finally do…..BAM, that's all you wanna do. It's a curse, it really is. Then again, it may have a little (or everything) to do with my all or nothing type of personality. Albeit another curse.

I guess I just have this urgency to spit out every detail of the last two years of my life. I want to….but I obviously won't. I mean, I'd be crazy to share every little detail. And I'd also be crazy if I didn't spread out at least some of those details I do plan on sharing so I can save myself from a horrible thing known as blogging guilt. Blogging guilt: a bad feeling that occurs when you really want to write a blog post but you can't think of anything to write about. I swear it's a real thing.

I will say that a nice bit has happened over the last few years. And that's strange because normally I always feel like there's never anything "new" with me. It's like when I run into people I haven't seen in a long time and I have to try and come up with an answer to the dreaded question of, "so, what's new with you?". I hate that, especially because I never have anything else to answer with besides, "um, not a whole lot, you?". But I feel like right now I could probably keep that conversation going a lot longer if someone was brave enough to ask me that question. Then again, I'd probably still answer with the same "um, not a whole lot" response because, let's be honest, I'm pretty sure that's the only type of response that people would expect as they're standing outside the entrance of a store in a busy mall. 

But I still haven't decided what I'm going to write about or how this blog will go in the future and that's perfectly fine with me. Except that's not really true at all because I've been thinking about it a nice bit over the last week. I've been asking myself questions like, will I carry on like old times? Will I try and have some organization going on as to things that I'll share? Will there be topics off limits? Will I focus only on certain things? Here's what I do know:

1) This blog name has got to go, like now. I cringe whenever I see it, or when I type it, or when I say it out loud. I'm actually in the process of trying to change it but, just like circa 2013, it's taking me forever to decipher and use HTML.

2) I love to write. It's fun for me. I enjoy just sitting down and typing away and I've really, really missed that. 

3) But I absolutely hate to reread the things I've written. And that becomes a bit of a problem when I want to write on a place that never goes away and is always there for me to see. Ironically enough, the posts where I open up and share the most are, hands down, my favourite to write but my least favourite to read. Just picture me hiding under the bed sheets as I read those if you want to get a better idea.

4) I'm probably going to have a lot more free time coming up and I'm going to need something that I'm interested in. Insert this blog.

And that's all I've got. As you can see, still no direction with how this is going to go. But I'm sure I'll figure it out, with one post at a time (even if I am hiding under my sheets as I reread them until then).

Until next time.