Now having the time to look back, I'd like to think that I was a pretty care free bride-to-be! Okay, okay, maybe 'care free' isn't the right word of choice, especially when it comes to describing anything to do with my personality, but I was definitely not as high strung over the wedding as I expected I was going to be. Oh how I wish my husband (yes, still strange) was here next to me so he could chime in and add his two sense on me and my emotional stability during that time. But, honestly, I think I did a pretty darn good job holding it all together if I do say so myself!!

Meeting our commissioner

My mom would also be a good one to ask (which, surprisingly, I've never done), because I'm pretty sure she had a shield just waiting to be worn whenever she was around me the week of the wedding. That's the one great thing about mom's though, they're sure not afraid to tell you when you need to relax and come back down to planet earth. Because I guess that's another thing about mom's, unfortunately they're usually the ones that are right smack dab in the middle of any meaningless melt downs or self destruction that's taking place.

Actually, now that I'm forcing myself to dig up any horrific wedding behavioural examples that I may have taken part in, there is a time or two that I remember being slightly annoyed and a teeny tiny bit dramatic. But maybe I'll save those examples for another day because, after all, I'm trying to make a point about how awesome and mature and sensible I acted most of the entire time.

It was on the day of our rehearsal though, just two days before the wedding, when it seemed like all of the emotions that I probably should have experienced throughout, came crushing down and hit me all at once, at that one very moment.

I had the week leading up to the wedding off from work, and while we were super busy getting things done and packing for our honeymoon, I must say I felt pretty good and calm. We even had some out of town family members stopping in for visits and it was so fun (and surreal) seeing them and knowing that they were here all because of us! As the saying goes, I was cool, calm and collected.

Meeting our photographer

But then came Thursday afternoon. Everything seemed to be piling on top of me, and all of the nerves and excitement and stress started to rush on in. I started to cry and I could not stop. It wasn't because of one thing or one feeling, it was just the weight of it all finally breaking through.

I had people emailing and calling and asking a bunch of questions, I was thinking of things that still had to be done, not only with the wedding, but with the rehearsal that night (which I ended up passing off completely to my mom that day. Seriously, my mom is the best!!), and I was worried about the weather, and whether our house was clean enough for everyone to get ready there, and I was also feeling very afraid that no one was going to have any fun!!! I know, I know, it's silly, but I swear there's something that happens during a wedding that completely knocks out any chance of realistic thinking.

From what I've been told, these are all normal, albeit slightly strange, bridal worries. However, when you're the type who really cares about people enjoying themselves, hosting a few big events in one weekend can sure take a toll on a type A, anxiety induced, over analyzer type of girl! Have you forgotten about the part where I mentioned about how awesome and mature and sensible I acted most of the time? Please don't!

I'd like to believe that as prepared as you are for the big day, nothing truly prepares you for the emotions that you're going to feel the day before or the day of the wedding, or in my case, two days before and the night before (but we'll get to that second part later). In most cases, you are on one hell of an emotional roller coaster, and you're just grabbing on and holding tight.

I honestly believe that regardless of how much time passes, there's certain things about our wedding that will stand out and be remembered for years and years to come. And it was the comforting and reassuring conversation that Todd and I had as I was crying that will always be one of them. It didn't have anything to do with the teeny meltdown that I was having, but it had everything to do with us and how I felt about him right then and there.

While I can't say that going forward I didn't worry at all about the weather, or the fun factor, or who was going to pick up the cake or flowers, or having to write our thank yous (and you get that the list goes on and on), I can say that I remember looking at Todd in that moment and just being soooo happy and thankful that I was going to be marrying him in a few days.

Just for the record - normally me stressing over the weather causes the hair on Todd's back to stand up like no other. I was, as a lot of people would say, "blessed", that he put his own feelings aside that day and loved me through the crazy times, because after all, isn't that what marriage is all about, folks?

Okay, so since I got a little carried away with the actual day, I'm going to have to save the rehearsal party that happened that night for another time.

Tell me though, what bridal meltdowns have you been through or witnessed? Let me (and others) know that we're not alone and that we've all been on this crazy bridal roller coaster together!

Until next time.